Lord of the Red Sox 11, I am No Reliever

So the Sox, Win and the Yanks lose to Baltimore and the Sox are AL East Champs. Good times. Over at Sons of Sam Horn there are two groups; the members, and those in the sandbox. I was one of those in the sandbox having not gotten my membership yet. There was a chance the Sandbox was going to be shut down for the playoffs, so I was now under a time constraint to get out my better stories I was saving for the playoffs. Which leads to what many have told me was the best of the Lord of the Red Sox entries.

"The Lord of the Red Sox" Mojo presents…

I Am No Reliever!

Scene: Fenway Park, the near future, ALCS, Game 6, Sox vs. Yanks. Sox are ahead in the series 3-2. The bullpen is spent after have been gone deep to in games 3,4,and 5. 7th Inning, Schilling has pitched well but is far past 100 pitches. Sox leads 5-2. Two on, One out...



Schill: (looks over to see who is coming to bat)



Damon: (Swoops towards the field, with Jeter on deck.)



Schill: Crap, he's got my number tonight. I can get him though.



Damon: (Steps into the batters box having gone 2-2 today with a Homer, Double and a walk.)


Tito: TIME! (Slow walks to mound…waves his left hand at the bullpen) Good game Schill.



Schill: Thanks. (Hands ball to Tito, walks to dugout)



Lester: Oh boy...Here we go.



Lester: (Takes the mound.)



Damon: (On the first pitch sends a line drive right back at Lester who snags it on the fly…the runners retreat to their bags.)


Lester: Two Down.



Jeter: (Steps into batters box, arches back…)



Lester: (First pitch, Swinging Strike One.)



Lester: (Second pitch, Swinging Strike Two)



Lester: (Third Pitch, Long Drive to Left….but sails foul missing Fisk's Pole by about two feet.) Whew that was close.



Jeter: (Leans out of the box and shouts out to Lester.) Fool, No Red Sox reliever can strike out the Captain of the Yankees.



Lester: I am no Reliever! (Throws pitch)



Jeter: (Strike Three. LOOKING!)



Jeter: NOooooooooo!



Coco: (Fist Pumps) YEAH!


(The Yanks never made it to the ALCS, The Sox went on to face just as big a challenge in Cleveland)

Lord of the Red Sox 10, Close the Door

Over at Sons of Sam Horn, one person starts the "Game" thread and as long as the Sox keep winning it is considered good luck for that person to start the next game thread...until the Sox lose. A few of the other posters there asked me If I would start up the next Game thread. I was honored and gladly took up the challenge...with what I think is the worst of my Lord of the Red Sox stories.

I had this image in my head of Papelbon walking over to Gagne and just saying WTF Dude! Okajima had also become such a key member of this team, I had to add him to a story. So here it is...

Two games up on the Yanks...with Three to go.

Matchup...
MIN: K. Slowey (4-0, 4.57)
BOS: D. Matsuzaka (14-12, 4.48)


"The Lord of the Red Sox" Mojo presents...

Close the Door

Scene: Fenway Park Bullpen. Tito has called a meeting of the entire pitching staff.



Tito: We have to win two of the next three games to take the AL East. I know we can do it. I feel real real good about our chances. So here is the game plan. Dice, I just need 6 strong innings out of you..no more, no less.



DiceK: I can do that.



Tito: Okie, I’m gonna need you to lock down the 7th for us.



Okie-Jima: Yep.



Tito: Gagne, the 8th is yours.



Gagne: Yes Master, Precious will do as you ask.



Tito: Paps you will wrap it up for us.



Papelbon: Can do Chief.



Tito: Ok lets do it…

(As everyone is leaving…)


Papelbon: Hey Gagne, got a second.

(As Gagne comes over, Paps grabs him and slams him against a wall)


Papelbon: I don't know what's gotten into your head. But we need you to come through for us tonight.



Papelbon: If you screw this thing up tonight. I'm gonna show you first hand what we did to the gators that stumbled into the bullpen back in Louisaina. Are we clear?



Gagne: Yesss, Precious would never do anything to hurt the Red Sox.



Papelbon: Good, now lets WIN this freakin thing!

(and they did)

Lord of the Red Sox 9, Change of Plan

Well, the Sox had all but clinched the AL East at this point. They kept winning, and the whole point of the Lord of the Red Sox storyline was to lose the AL East and take the wild card. So I had to changes to make in the story. Then looking at what pictures to use it struck me how much the wall of Helmsdeep looked like the Green Monster at Fenway. Mount Doom was already cast as Yankee stadium, so I figured I would put both settings into this one story...


"The Lord of the Red Sox" mojo presents...

Change of Plan

Scene: Fenway Park, Monster seats.




Lowell: It was nice of Tito to give us the day off.



Lugo: Well, to stick with our plan of taking the Wild Card we have to tank a couple of games. These seats are pretty sweet too.



Lowell: Best seats in the majors.



BigPapi: My seat won't go up any higher. I cannot see a thing.



Lugo: Shall I describe the game for you, or would you like me to find you a box?


Meanwhile….
Scene: Yankee Stadium, Third level bleachers, first row overlooking the field.




Pedrioa: We made it, Youk. Now all we have to do is drop the AL East Ring and the Wild Card will be ours.

[Pedroia holds the ring over the railing]



Youk: Go on! Now! Throw it in!



[Pedroia stares at the ring, and thinks]



Youk: What are you waiting for? Just let it go!

[Pedroia turns an looks at Sam]


Pedroia: The Ring is ours. @#&% the Wild Card. You know this will come down the Yankees and us. You know it's going to go 7 games. Would you rather play game 7 in this hell hole or back in Fenway?



Youk: uh…Fenway…What the hell were we thinking?



Pedroia: I don't know, let's go, I've got a phone call to make.


Back at Fenway…




Tito: (Comes out on the field in his League approved uniform and shouts up to the Monster seats) CHANGE OF PLAN BOYS, GET YOUR ASSES DOWN HERE, WE ARE GONNA TAKE THE AL EAST!!!!



Lugo: Sweet!



BigPapi: Let me at them!



Lowell: Wait a minute, who is pitching tonight?



Beckett: Don’t worry guys, I got this one…and we will WIN!



(of course the Sox lose this game. I was thinking I would take a break from the Lord of the Red Sox Mojo, but no...)